HWRCC 3xi Vs Camberley cc 3xi (h) - Match Report by Lloydy

Risman, Crane, Doddy, Lloyd ©, Copeland +, Cameron, Robinson, Taylorson, Kennedy, Tong, Laight

As the proud captain of the Wick’s newest league side, it was with a degree of trepidation that we approached our first game in our new league. All the ingredients for a good days cricket were there: Weather - Check, 11 players - Check, Oppo - Check, Typical Wick pitch - Check. So all going well it seemed until I lost the toss. The oppo had a car missing and we were missing an Aussie (something about shrimp and barbies I dunno) so I helpfully suggested that we would be happy to field first with 10 to enable their remaining players to arrive.

Wick – 1 Camberly - 0

Kirky opened up with the new ball and bowled a lovely line and length that was instantly a challenge to the batsmen who struggled to get their head round the ball angling across and swinging in. At the other end we opened with new boy Graeme Tong. Text from Matty D mid week [He is rapid! Opening bowler Fact!!]. He wasn’t wrong and Tongy hit the mark immediately and took a wicket with his second ball. He and Kirky formed a formidable partnership, miserly on runs and always threatening to take wickets. At 3 for 3 (with only eight players present) Wick tails were firmly up and Camberly looked to be in a spot of bother.

After a spell of 9 overs for 4 wickets and having ripped through the upper order Tong was replaced by Taylorson who continued the demolition with his own run of 4 wickets from 7 overs for 10 runs, supported by Duncan at the other end who shipped in with a wicket off his 4 overs.

Camberly’s innings closed all out for 54 off 30.3 overs. Advantage Wick!

Teas- Interesting Asian fusion with Chicken Tikka [Good work Lloydy - like your use of the word fusion - Ed] but bread slightly dry so 6/10 [Hmmm. Perhaps you were through them so early that the bread was ever so slightly fresher - Ed]

The Wick innings was opened by Mssrs Risman and Crane – a formidable blend of composure and explosive power against the old ball. With the words “You have 75 overs to chase this score so don’t try and do it in the first 3 Cranesy!” they resisted temptation and I am pleased to say batted with control and common sense.

The score was brought up off just 10 overs without losing a wicket and allowed a satisfied team onto the terrace, Magners in hand to cheer on the 2s. An excellent team performance typified by first class fielding and bowling from all. We won’t win games by this kind of margin every week, but we have set ourselves a yardstick for measuring our bowling and fielding against and if we can get close to maintaining this form we will be a tough team to beat.

WICKWASH

[Image is obviously Tongs four for... - Ed]

Match Report - 3rd xi vs Cheam Cavaliers - by Lloydy

It’s good to be back…

The first pre season game seems to have come upon us at a rapid rate of knots. It seems like only yesterday that we were down in Southampton, the rain coming down in buckets, talk of league defeats by the narrowest of margins and people's individual moments of mupperty ringing in our ears. I almost fell off my seat when the announcement of forthcoming net sessions was announced. “But it’s still dark at 5pm and the Corona doesn’t taste right yet. It can’t be cricket time already.” Was my retort. In the preceding week the highs and lows of selection began to become apparent though despite having 30 odd players MIA we managed to select 3 sides for our first warm up game. (Well done lads).

The ground was a pleasant backwater public park beside Ham House for this 40 over a side encounter, where the trimmed out field was married up nicely with a nice flat but very green batting road. Monkey Boy and our SA overseas player began eyeing up the short boundary and I went off to win the toss, which I subsequently won and elected to bat.

We got off to a flying start as Forrest (SA) and Tom B-W (both hockey recruits for 08) set a ferocious pace of 10 an over until Forry fell LBW, (triggered by Kirky- sorry) for 18 to be replaced by Monkey who did what Monkey and kept the pace up nicely. At 100 odd of 10 over’s Jimmy C at square leg shouted “Is it 40 over’s each?” and our entire team grinned and nodded.

Tom fell having provided the stability for the big hitters to bring Doddy to the crease who started well and played with good composure. Monkey then fell going for 1 smash too many and brought Jimmy C to the crease with the words “Slow Down, Play yourself in and you have 28 over’s still to bat”. Doddy and Jimmy put on an excellent, composed partnership of 80 odd runs with both looking like they had been netting for months. 5 to go and Doddy was squared up in front with the ball staying low and LBW was correctly asked for and awarded to bring your scribe and skipper to the crease. A Flurry of quick singles and doubles ensued to see Jimmy C to his maiden Wick 50 before falling for 55 in the penultimate over. I managed to pick out the smallest player on their team to hit over his head for a big 6 over mid off, as part of a quick fire 16 and Harry smashed a nice 4 off his second ball before running himself out. 215-5 off 40 over’s… first game of the season… That’ll do nicely.

Teas were an interesting mix of biscuits and crisps out of the packet with a melee of home made sarnies. Slightly larger than we are accustomed to meant less gluttony all round but a nice BLT made up for it. Rating 5.

Our fielding was a little on the rusty side as you would expect and we were thankful for a slow outfield for once. That said, Kirky produced a lovely economical spell and was unlucky not to be rewarded with a wicket. Likewise Robbo produced the goods after an initial wobble and was equally as miserly on the runs. The oppo scored at about 5 an over and apart from punishing our bad stuff seemed to offer little in scoring shots. New recruit Nick Parkes came onto replace Tommy for a full 8 overs and was rewarded with a good 4-for and bowled a nice line and length. He was ably assisted by Jimmy c who kept the runs down and had their high scoring number 2 dropped twice before Tom B-W taking over from Nick at the tennis court end bowled him as part of his own 4 wicket haul. Dave Ashmore had little chance to shine but did get to briefly turn his arm over in the cause. All in all an encouraging start to the new league campaign with some excellent individual performances. Fielding and bowling practice all round and some consistency throughout the club and this will be a great season.

P.S Corona just tastes better at the wick after a Wickwash! P.P.S Here's a cavalier as driven in Cheam

HWRCC 2xi vs Westfield 2xi - Match Report

HWRCC 2xi vs Westfield Saints (a)

HWRCC won the toss and inserted Westfield

Westfield 64 (Hill four for) HWRCC 65-1 (Gangoldy 37*, Wright 20ish*) HWRCC win by 9 wickets

Fudge*, Wright, Gangoldy, Doddy, Cameron, Clark+, Lofting, Marfleet, Soppitt, Noor, Hill

Wick w ash away Westfield

As soon as the skipper called correctly and Westfield had descended to 3-2, their skipper and best bat back in the hutch, it was clear that we wouldn’t get much cricket out of this game. On the back of a call off last weekend and hardly a game on tour, a few of the boys have forgotten what the game’s about. This one was wrapped up by 4pm – so early that the rather grumpy young lady who assembled the teas wasn’t actually at the ground to lay it out.

Westfield’s ground was sodden and the wicket was, although typical of this summer and something we are all getting used to, not ideal for cricket. John Hill, bowling up the slope and swinging the ball mainly away from the righthander, was simply too good in the conditions. Only some unfortunate fielding in the cordon prevented him from taking a well deserved Michelle after he had rattled the stumps a couple of times and we had seen Del take a simply stunning one handed catch running from mid off to take one behind the bowler.

Lofting, whose own bowling profits from harder, bouncier, tracks, was back to somewhere near his best despite this sludgy mess, tormenting Westfield’s left handed No 4 to distraction. That he assembled six runs was only down to the evil nature of the cordon who let a few between them to prolong his torture. Eventually it was too much for us to bear and Marfleet dived across Fudge to take a brilliant juggling one handed catch in the slips to put him out of his misery. Lofting also took the important wicket of skipper Bailey LBW to give Westfield little chance of posting a competitive score.

Westfield, it seems, have decided to go after funding for women’s cricket, now sporting two young ladies in the xi. This represents a 100 per cent increase on last year which shows something is going in the right direction for them. Both acquitted themselves reasonably well and played straighter that some of their male colleagues. However Billy, having experienced a week on tour with no cricket, was obviously an angry man and, bowling first change, bounced one of them out, the unfortunate recipient nicking it behind for Clark to take a simple catch.

This was not before Doddy had unfortunately obscured a run out from a brilliant stop and gather at point from Jack. Prone, Jack fired the ball in, Clark collected, the bails were removed with a theatrical flourish and the ‘keeper was cavorting and dancing like a Raptor in a nightclub before being informed that the even the Sun had been blotted out by Doddy’s harris. Doddy’s point that the umpire should have moved to get a better view of the action was well made, but the umpire would have needed to move to the 45 to see anything…

Once the partnership of the Westfield ladies was broken there was little left in terms of batting resources. The introduction of Soppitt and Marfleet quickly wrapped up the innings, between them they took 3 for 2 in three overs. Soppitt, in this extraordinary season has recorded another unbelievable analysis of 2-2. He can hardly fail to top the season’s averages on this form. Marfleet’s one over produced a tame prod back to him from a bat who had tried to hoist the majority of the first four balls into the neighbouring county. Some indecision there…

Sadly there’s not much more to record. Hill even managed to pick up a catch off Soppitt and with so few runs to chase, MOM was his. Fudgey and Wrighty opened the batting and for the unfortunate Fudge a duck ensued, bowled by the best ball of Habib’s spell. He was replaced by Gangoldy who was in better fettle than at Hambledon. Once he’d had a look he quickly assembled 37 not out to win the game in the 16th over.

Tea was the league’s best of the season so far. While not up to the almost impossibly high standards set at Hambledon earlier in the week, this was a belter. The usual sandwiches included excellent cheese and pickle, and the chef had used a variety of breads including a French country loaf for pate. A couple of years ago standards here were even higher. Wickman remembers some amazing cream and custard tarty things and sponge cake. Mild disappointment then, but still an excellent effort and the first league 8. If only standards had been so high on the field. The skipper awarded himself TFC for failing to get a hand on a number of slip catches and for playing over a Yorker. This saved the bacon of most of the batsmen who didn’t get a knock owing to the amoeba of an innings form Westfield.

Another 20 points, the most emphatic performance of the season and still top of the league by a comfortable margin going into the weekend off. Gangoldy looks much happier here...

Vive le Wick.

Tour Diary - Goldy is Lively

Sunday 2.00pm Club Day is reinstated in a restricted format as the Sun gets his batting helmet on and twenty or so cricket starved Wick men play a two innings “overs” game. Clarky is bowled first ball of the match to much amusement as he misses a Linter slower ball. Big, big sixes are hit. The club house roof is peppered, one of Cranesy’s goes through the roof of the club. Fudgey leathers one at the scorebox which is “still going up”. Matty D hoists one into the carpark and on to the roof of Cranesy’s mini – schoolboy error to park on that side of the car park? Someone else (Fudgey again?) collects the sober and unamused friend of Goldy’s who has parked next to Cranesy. Schoolgirl error… other mighty blows are struck by the usual suspects, Crane, Doddy, Matty etc etc. Even Leggsy gets runs for Hibby’s team. Fudgey’s team fails dismally to assemble a really taxing score in the first innings and trails by approximately 50 runs. A slightly better second innings gives Hibby’s team something to chase and Barrell amongst others gets on with it. They overhaul the total and everyone retires to the bar for some some pre-tour lash. Goldy has been very busy in front and behind the bar it seems. Tour, it is agreed, will be lively.

3rds vs Bank of England - by Wickman Jr

HWRCC 3xi v BANK OF ENGLAND

When Harry met Lloydy…

Hampton Wick 3s get second win on the spin to make mockery of non-league status

HWRCC – 135 for 6 (35 overs) – Alex (47 not out), Lloydy 30 + Bank of England – 89 all out – (Laight, and Iqbal taking 3 wickets a piece)

Do you remember in When Harry met Sally when Harry Burns opined about the problems of marriage and long-term relationships? (Stay with me on this… I’m about to draw a tenuous link)[Wickman is reading this very carefully and suspects the urine is being extracted, but carry on]. Well, for those of you who’ve only ever perused the “wrestle mania” and “adult” sections of your local Blockbuster Video (firstly, get some culture and secondly, be thankful you don’t have a woman) here’s what Harry had to say on the subject:

“Right now everything is great, everyone is happy, everyone is in love and that is wonderful. But you gotta know that sooner or later you're gonna be screaming at each other about who's gonna get this dish (Harry points at plate). This eight dollar dish will cost you a thousand dollars in phone calls to the legal firm of That's Mine, This Is Yours.”

Ahh… such a doozy of a quote isn’t? Basically, summing up, Harry’s thinking, “yeah, I really like this bird I’m seeing at the moment, but just give it time and we’ll soon be fighting over last night’s pizza, and it will all end in tears. That’s the way relationships are”. (Just as a side point though, if you do have a penchant for “the larger lady” – and who among us doesn’t? - this WILL happen, FACT… and trust me you won’t be getting any of the pizza).

While it might not be immediately obvious as to what any of this has to do with cricket, if you think about the situation of Hampton Wick’s young star keeper – also named Harry (part of the tenuous link being drawn here, keep tight hold) – the connection is clear. Although Harry is by no means a slice of pizza, he is indeed a dish that everyone at the Wick will be fighting over in the next few months - FACT. The harmony that currently exists between the Club’s first, second and third xis will almost surely be strained after his brilliant performance behind the sticks against Bank of England on Saturday. Harry met Lloydy, and Lloydy liked what he saw.

The young colt single handedly saved 20-30 runs behind the stumps in a stellar performance, with some of the best glove work I’ve seen since I took a tour of the Kookaburra factory and saw them making wicket keeping gloves. Keep tight hold. Not only did he ensure that the Wick picked up their second win on the bounce (“we would be top the league… say we would be top the league…”) but also confirmed that when Fudgey meets Matty D, they will be fighting over just who will get first call on Harry when Garf and Clarky are away?

Indeed. Now to the match.

After last week’s heroics by Iqbal, the talk permeating the club all week was whether or not the boys could back it up against the Bank of England on Saturday (by “talk”, I mean, AJ saying to Matty D at nets: “Great win for the 3s on Saturday eh?”, Matty D: “yeah FACT – reckon they can back it up?”, AJ: “Don’t know mate – yeah why not”? MD: “Jimmy C’s good isn’t he?”, AJ: “Yeah, he’s lively as well!”… you get the gist). Following a couple of late inclusions into the squad, and a mysterious decision from the opposition to field in the wet having won the toss, the Wick went out to bat on what Doddy mused was a “bloody slow” track.

Led by openers Risman and Doddy, the Wick made a slow but confident start. However, with the pitch playing as invitingly as a (deleted, this is a family blog), it wasn’t long before they were both back in the hutch after some cavalier shots. Jimmy C joined them soon after following a ridiculous dance down the wicket, leaving the Wick at 4 for 30 after just 15 overs.

Thankfully, stability was soon restored as Lloydy and Alex arrived at the crease, helping to rescue the innings. Alex never looked troubled by their attack, pushing 2s and scoring boundaries at will, while Lloydy kept the runs ticking over at the other end with his usual, aggressive style. A partnership of 70 was quickly put together, helping the Wick to reach a respectable 135 at the close.

After the tea interval, and a great gee up from Lloydy, the boys took to the field in a buoyant mood. With “Direct” and Iqbal opening the attack, there was every reason to believe it could be a short afternoon. Direct, bowling with his usual pace and bounce was as probing as ever, while Iqbal got the ball to swing and dart all over the place, putting their batsmen under pressure from the off. It was little wonder then that their openers were back in the pavilion after only a few balls, both falling in quick succession.

Given the Wick’s good start and sensing an early finish, Doddy helped lighten the mood with a couple of horrible sledges about “banking” to unsettle the Bank of England batsmen. Listed by no means in order of popularity, Doddy came up with these gems:

“Make them play by ‘direct’ debit Des" “Good to see that our bowling is fixed and not variable” “this is gold standard stuff Wick” “send the next one down with interest”

Surprisingly Doddy’s oddball behaviour clearly rattled the batsmen. Direct and Iqbal managed to pick up another couple of wickets each, with Harry taking superb catches on both occasions. This, however, was only a small part of an amazing repertoire from Harry, who dived at everything and pulled off some amazing stops in the process. With the Bank now at 5 for 50, the game looked to be over as a contest.

With few remaining wickets on offer, Kirky and Jimmy C then came on to get into the act. Jimmy C couldn’t buy a wicket, despite constant appealing (Monty Panesar style) while Kirky, on the other hand, swinging the ball beautifully up the hill, picked up three wickets in quick succession, almost getting a cheeky hat-trick.

Thanks to Tommy Robinson and Ian T, the tail was quickly taken apart and the game was over. The Wick had bowled out Bank for under 90 runs with a brilliant bowling and fielding performance, led by the incomparable Harry behind the stumps.

In the team huddle after the win, Lloydy spoke eloquently about the “solid” performance. It’s two wins on the spin now for the Wick 3s, but can they make it three in a row? There’ll no doubt be talk at nets during the week, courtesy of AJ and Matty D, but don’t be surprised if there’s talk about which team is going to keep Harry.

Yours in Wick, Wickman Junior

HWRCC 3RD X1 VS THAMES DITTON

Thames Ditton – 150 (50)

HWRCC – 151-9 (40)

Hampton Wick steal dramatic win under fading light….

The meaning of ‘Wick’?

Word reaches Wickman Junior of a conversation that took place between Clarky and Jimmy C outside a local establishment in Soho (not G.A.Y) before the first match of the season. With an unwelcome third party taking part in the convo, the talk invariably steered away from matters cricket – something that Jimmy C and Clarky cannot stand for. For them, if you can’t reminisce about Graeme Gooch (333 at the Oval – wikipedia it), Tubby Taylor or Steve Waugh (“wo wo wo, what is he good for?”) over a couple of cold brews, then you’re simply better off six feet under – FACT.

As luck would have it, and before having to conjure up cheeky excuses about needing to “get up early”, the pair managed to wrestle discussion back to cricket, and everything Wick. But an odd-ball question, posed by the third party about the Wick, was set to create confusion. The question went something like this:

Third Party (unwelcome): “You guys always go on about the Wick! What does it mean to be ‘wick’? How do you define something that is / isn’t wick?

Despite being able to speak so eloquently and definitively about cricket (Clarky…not Jimmy C) the pair, on this occasion, didn’t have an answer. Throwing out words like “indefinable”, the two were left completely jiggered. “What does it mean to be wick?” they pondered as they strolled home. It probably kept them up all night.

But after Saturday’s 3rd XI victory over Thames Ditton, Wickman Junior believes that Clarky and Jimmy C should now be closer than ever to answering this “controversial” question. Following one of the club’s greatest ever fight backs, the performance of young colt Junaid Iqbal just screamed “Wick” at every turn.

On a hot and muggy afternoon, the Wick went out to field against league side Ditton. Following some choice words from Lloydy (“I am a captain, but I’ll let you guys call the shots”), we set about tearing into their top order. With Junaid and “Direct” coming from both ends, their openers were quickly under pressure - Junaid bowling with tremendous accuracy and “Direct” sending down plenty of chin music. It was not long before the openers fell.

With Jimmy C and Alex coming in at first change, the boys kept the pressure up. As Jimmy C took out the off peg of two of Ditton’s top order (while also being dropped 4 times – thanks Doddy) and Alex swung the ball (Matty Hoggard style) to take another wicket, the visitors were soon in trouble at 6 for 60.

However with temperatures soaring, the Wick started to take their foot off the pedal. Sloppy fielding and Thames Ditton’s 8th wicket stand of 70, helped them to reach 150 at the tea break. With a weakened batting line up, the Wick felt that a great opportunity to win the match had been squandered.

With a required run rate of 3 runs an over, a good start was imperative. But this did not eventuate, as the reply started in the worst possible way. With their spinners opening from end, Doddy, Lloydy and Direct all went cheaply in the first few overs. And despite a couple of boundaries from Jimmy C and some resistance from Tommy Robinson, the Wick soon had their tail exposed. At 7/67, a comeback did not look likely.

But colt Junaid Iqbal, a “real thinker” according to Jimmy C, had other ideas. Knowing that there were plenty of overs to go, and with the weather still hot and sticky, he pushed the singles on offer and let the better balls to go through to the keeper. It was text book batting – just play each ball on its merits. Predictably, Thames Ditton became increasingly frustrated, and subsequently became tired and sloppy in the field. With the score now creeping up to 7 for 110, the belief that a result could be pulled off was growing, and so was the confidence the Wick’s batsmen.

At 7/130, the match was heading to a climax. But as the Wick lost 2 quick wickets with another 20 runs needed to win, it seemed like it had all been too little too late. However, as Iqbal kept Merwin protected at the non-strikers end (great understanding at Colt level - FACT), and with the two’s being picked off readily, the Wick needed just 4 runs to win the match. It would not be a lie to say that every run was cheered on by the entire squad, now standing on the edge of the boundary in anticipation.

Sensing a dramatic win, Iqbal was cool under the pressure (remember…he’s 13!!!). Letting a wide ball go through to the keeper, the Wick was overjoyed to see the keeper fluff at it. And as the ball went past fine leg and trickled over the boundary, bedlam erupted.

As Iqbal through his bat in the air, the boys charged onto the field for a massive embrace. Wickman Junior has never seen more high fives and [phrase edited out owing to unsuitability in a family publication] in his life. It was a jubilant moment for the boys – pure elation - FACT.

At this moment, everyone knew what it meant to be Wick. But just don’t expect anyone to give you an answer….

Yours in Wick,

Wickman Junior.

Quiz Night

If you didn't make it to quiz night a week or so ago you missed a cracking evening. Del, Fudgey, Mackie and Tommy D combined with their better halfs to take the spoils. Hibby - pictured here in an outrageous waistcoat - played to Del's strong point with a round on cockernee rhyming slang although quite where he got some of his definitions from is open to some conjecture.

Goldy is pictured here trying to drag his team back into the contest with a valiant apple bobbing attempt and assembled Wick members and guests are pictured in the "Wickton Factor" round wearing as much cricket gear as they could find in 5 minutes. A cracking evening.

Many thanks to Dom, Tun-Up, Northern Nick D, Hibby and Clarky for organising and cooking. Look out for the next social at the end of June.

3rds vs Crossbats.... Match Rep by Wickman Jr

HWRCC 3RD XI vs CROSSBATS

TEAM – Lloydy (c), Jimmy C, Taylorson, Conner, Doddy, Sayce, Iqbal, Tommy, Kirky, Derrick.

HWRCC finish on 8-130; Paul “strokemaker” Sayce making a majestic 65 and Taylorson a cheeky 20.

CROSSBATS finish with 4-134, winning by 6 wickets.

Please welcome back into the fold….Ashley Giles

Hampton Wick Royal Cricket Club, Bushey Park, Hampton Wick, has been the setting for many special occasions over the last hundred odd years. It was the venue for the Queen’s first outdoor sojourn amongst the common folk (you might have to check that on wikipedia – Wickman Junior doesn’t have time for these trivialities), the place where actress Kierra Knightly turned up for a few cheeky beverages (and had her cheeks tested, if you take Joey’s word as read), and the first official sighting of Wickman, still revered as the doyen of the club. Jimmy C disputes this though…. “who is Wickman?”

But all of these events, while significant in the Club’s history, pale in comparison to what can only be described as the most surreal day ever witnessed at The Wick. For May 26th 2007 was the day that Mrs Cricket himself, Ashley Giles MBE (or OBE…again Wikipedia it), made a triumphant return to the game playing for the Crossbats. It was a privilege to say that we were there to witness such an august occasion.

Despite the doubts of HWRCC’s 3rd XI about the veracity of Ashley Giles’ appearance for the Crossbats, new captain “Lloydy” (“do you want me to tell you my average again?”) decided to get down to business and ignore the naysayers. Heading out to bat on a newly trimmed and refurbished outfield (Many thanks to Fudgey for taking heed of Wickman Junior’s comments on these pages last week), the Wick set about posting a solid total.

Led by the masterful Paul Sayce (“are you AJ in disguise?”) and “Direct” Derrick, we looked totally at ease with the opening bowlers. Pushing boundaries and singles at ease, the opening pair had already racked up 20 odd by the time Derrick (“the weather in this country is toilet – FACT”), got an unlucky top edge and was sent packing. And despite Doddy (“just back from Vegas”) and Lloydy going cheaply, we were still confident of posting a score.

But Ashley Giles didn’t just pick Hampton Wick for a “light-hearted” return to the game, and just be “a part” of the action. Not on your nelson. As Jimmy C strode purposely out to the wicket (despite recent knocks), “Gilo” had already found our weakness, and the game was as good as over as a contest. As Sayce skied another hook shot to the boundary, “Gilo” - just like he did from Ponting in the Second Ashes Test in Adelaide last year – dropped a sitter. It was just the spur the Crossbats needed.

With their Captain sighting this typical “Gilo” ineptitude on the boundary, Ashley was brought on to bowl his usual left arm pies. Game over. Whether it was divine intervention or the kinship of all living things “Gilo”, like the master he is, tore through Jimmy C and the remaining batsmen – despite the brief resistance of Taylorson and Robinson. Managing only 130, the Wick had succumbed to Mrs Cricket. Welcome back to the game mate.

After a lovely tea interval and a few encouraging words from Clarky - “130 is defendable – FACT” – we took to the field. With one player short, Lloydy deputizing behind the stumps, and the rain becoming stronger, we were up against it from the get-go. “Gilo”, spurred on by Jimmy C’s taunts at first slip, punished our openers all over the park. Jimmy C is developing a reputation for stupid sledging (note: how long can you go before the saying “that’s probing Iqbal…good stuff” gets overused?)

“Direct” and “Iqbal”, although talented bowlers, could not match the quality of “Gilo” – it was a harsh but important lesson for the Wick. The pundits often say that “form is temporary and class is forever” and Gilo, the best thing to happen to cricket since Mark Ealham rolled his arm over, fits this description to a T.

Despite a few late wickets and a great catch by Jimmy C (the ball was a sponge at this point – FACT), the Crossbats coasted to victory. As “Gilo” walked off with bat in hand, acknowledging the crowd, Wickman Junior shed a cheeky tear. I have never considered “turning” for anyone in my life, but at 6.00 pm on May 26th 2007, it could easily have happened.

Best of luck for the future “Gilo”, and welcome back!

Wickman Junior

Duck Tax Update

The Sherriff of Wickingham reports that Duck Tax - after a slow start - is catching on.

Recent victims of the regime include Cranesy, Doddy, Hibby, Coley and Mackie. With a quarter of the season gone, the tax has yielded £22.50. That's not even enough for a pair of dodgy pads Lingfield stylee yet, but funds are building...

Wickman, of course, wishes all the club's bats the best of luck for the rest of the season...

Match Report - 2ndxi vs Lingfield - by Clarky

Lingfield cc 2xi vs HWRCC 2nd xi

Lofting, Goldyou’reindestructible, Fudge*, Mackie (triggered), Clark+, Taylorson, Doddy, Soppitt, Nicholas, Laight, Lown

HWRCC 191-7 (50 overs) Fudge 41, Clark 38, Del Boy (36*)

Lingfield cc 124 all out (32.4) Krusty 5-42

Hampton Wick win by a nose as Lingfield turn up to the races

A different class of opposition pushed an eventually victorious Wick 2s hard this week. We had been reduced to 43-3 after 17 overs on a Victoria sponge of a wicket which was damper than Lindsey Lohan’s Jack and Danny. A partnership of 53 between Fudgey (41) and Clarky (38) rebuilt the innings before an 8th wicket unbroken partnership of 66 between Del Boy (36*) and Del Boy Direct (19*) gave us maximum batting points and enough runs to attack Lingfield. Lownsy took a well deserved Michelle and the points were ours. This was gritty, backs to the wall, stuff, and HWRCC justifiably retain their spot at the top of the league this morning.

It's a tribute to the strength of the club that we made four changes to the 11 this week - Debuts in the league for Nick Doddy and Derek Nicholas - and still came away with all 20.

Lingfield play at an ugly ground shared with a football club. The pavillion looks like a Nissen Hut and hides a scruffy interior and a particularly gruesome set of the coldest showers ever. The outfield was spoiled by big brown patches of bare earth where footballers had plied their trade over the winter. New nets aside Lingfield looks like a club that’s “rebuilding”.

They put out what looked like a very young, but talented, team. They looked good in the field pouncing on anything and whizzing the ball around – although perhaps they were short a bowler – and grounding three absolutely vital catches let down what was an impressive performance. Certainly it was difficult to pierce the ring early on as the pitch played very slowly and they took the pace off the ball to some effect.The first of the catches grassed reprieved Clarky when he had reached only 8. This cost them 30 runs. They later put down both Dels which cost them the 70 runs that pushed us to safety. Catches can win matches and putting them down yesterday cost Lingfield 20 points because their batting was good enough to overhaul a smaller total.

Lingfield won the toss and inserted. What a surprise... After Goldy and MS had watchfully established a base, their wickets fell quickly. They were joined by the unlucky Mackie who was adjudicated caught behind for 0 (quack) off thin air. Fudgey and Clarky then set themselves to bat time and mixed aggression against the short ball and bad ball with resolute defence. It wasn’t pretty – Clarky squirted nearly every run he made between 10 and 20 through first slip – and not off an open face – but it was effective. Some satisfying pull shots and hooks from both bats were emphatic. A cover drive from Clark was applauded. However neither went on and capitalised on the starts they had made on a pitch that was difficult to get “in” on.

A mini collapse saw us subside from 103-3 to 125-7. Doddy was particularly unlucky – beginning to play his muscular brand of cricket he was given out in one of Frank’s bolder leg before decisions which looked to most observers (including the opposition) to be sliding down leg like an attack of Delhi belly on a hiking holiday. We were in a bit of trouble at this point. One batting point in the bag was hardly the sort of haul we were looking for and 125 was not enough. Things looked worse as the two Dels found things difficult. The crucial drops intervened though and both got on with some positive batting. Lingfield ran out of bowling and suddenly the game changed. The unlucky Michael suddenly conceded 21 in three overs and a new bowler Powell had a Barry Crocker, leaking 36 in three including 16 off the last as Del went aerial. The skipper was happy to declare on 191 after 50, giving us 45 in reply.

Tea was not bad at all. Pickled onions were good news. Proper sizes mugs of tea. Those jam tart thingies. Lots of cakey things. Just half a point off DBW on mid season form. 6.5 out of ten.

However things took a poor turn at this point as oppo player Michael realised that his car had been stolen by thieving pikeys and we realised that MS had only escaped the same fate because he’d parked in full view of the pitch. A number of the boys lost keys and shrapnel – a useful if annoying reminder to put EVERYTHING in the valuables bag. The Police, of course, didn’t turn up – why bother? – and the oppo lost one player who was forced to go to the station to deal with them. It left a sour taste and ruined MS’s evening as he couldn’t leave the car for fear the thieves would return to drive it away.

Back on the pitch Lingfield made a good start, punishing anything short. Boundaries flowed. Game on. However Lownsy was in inspired form. The hot conditions assisted his prodigious inswing and the spongey deck made him pitch it up (they were good enough to pull and cut anything short). The dangerous looking Batty slapped a fuller ball to Mackie at point who clung on to a difficult chance. The other opener, Gradon, missed a yorker that swung prodigiously to bowl him through the gate (top bowling). The number 4, who looked like Andrew Symonds when he was growing his hair, mysteriously padded up to one that would have missed leg and off but not middle and we had them 29 for three from 23 for none.

A partnership developed between the useful looking Driscoll (useful looking apart from the cubic zirconium earring) and ‘keeper Gammon. But Krusty bowled the ball of the day – seaming away off the pitch to smash back the off stump – to rid us of Driscoll and MS bagged an LB to get rid of No 6. Del then threw up 5 overs of hand grenades to take 2 for 10 in combination with Clark behind the stumps. It remained for Kirky to take 1-12 and for Lownsy to finish the game with a final LBW, the unfortunate Michaels still dealing with Plod and unable to bat.

And that was that. Krusty’s impressive season with the ball continues unabated. He's currently averaging 7.5 in league cricket. Del (whose average is better than Lownsy's but doesn't yet qualify due to not taking quite enough wickets) backed up his all-rounder tag with runs this week – at the perfect pace and time – and got his name on the sixes league board too. Good runs for Fudgey and Clarky – neither of whom contributed much the previous week - showed that all the bats are more than capable of delivering at this level – even on a soft deck that was not easy to bat on. We should spare a word for opposition skipper Daw, who bowled 15 overs off the reel, cleverly taking the pace off, and deserved more than the wicket of MS to show for it.

Lownsy deservedly picked up MOM for his 5 for 42.

Good game Lingfield. Enjoyed it. Good luck with the rest of your first season in the Fullers.

An Auspicious start

Long Ditton XI vs Hampton Wick XI Saturday 14th April

Hampton Wick XI. M. Goulborn, P.Hibberd, D. Fudge*, A. Jackson, N. Doddy, K. Razza, S. Bishop, G. Jones+, S. Whinney, D. Lowns, K. Laight

Hampton Wick XI won the toss and decided to bat 247/5 from 40 overs P. Hibberd 100 (retired) Goulborn 41 Doddy 31

Long Ditton XI 153/8 from 40 overs S. Whinney 3/20

Hampton Wick won by 94 runs

Cricketers by their very nature are superstitious creatures. Some will put one sock on before another, others just blame their own inadequacies and failings on lady lucks cruel hand. There is however no substitute for hard work and application.

The players of The Wick have worked hard over the winter at nets. Attendance has been good and the cameraderie as palpable as ever. The fact that The Wick were at the ground warming up an hour before the home team, had two younger members of the squad with them who had volunteered for scoring duties, and a band of jocund supporters spoke volumes for the appetite within the club.

To jilt fortune's kindly eyes is unwise though, and if luck is earned then skipper Fudge winning the toss was a favourable glance in the Wick XI's direction. Long Ditton were inserted and it was time to find out how far we had progressed since January.

Goldy and Hibby opened up and set the tone early. Whilst Hibby was brutal with anything off line or length, Goldy played in the rock-like manner anyone who has watched him over the last few years will have become accustomed to. This partnership could prove to be a fruitful one in the coming months as they seem to complement each other's style. Goldy's watchful rotation of the strike provides a harmonious equilibrium to Hibby's punchy stroke making. A hundred up for the first wicket partnership in the first game was just the boost everyone's confidence needed in April.

The pitch was superb given the time of year, with a generally true bounce. It was a little slow at times but certainly quicker than expected. This showed as the openers mistimed a few, and had the fielding been sharper then the scorecard might have read 90/3 or 4 at the 20 over drinks interval, rather than 100+/0. Hard work often manifests itself as good fortune on the field.

After the break both players pushed on in search of a big total knowing there was plenty of batting to come. Watching Goldy hit two fours and a six, straight down the ground, in the 21st over, was like witnessing DBW charm: Unforseen.

As the second and third change bowlers came and went the scoreboard ticked along until Goldy holed-out to long-on. Fudgey came to the middle and looked industrious and aware of the need to play himself in to the game and the season. All the while Hibby continued to blaze away and reached his ton and retired to give others a chance. It was an innings of blood-thirsty stroke making, and although he was dropped 3 or 4 times he made the most of it, and a comment made to Goldy may mark a change in Paul's run making fortunes for 2007:

'You know Goldy, if I hit it on the floor I make bigger scores'

Beware the Fullers League!

If Hibby was in peril of using up his helping of luck too early in the year, there was no such chance of AJ doing the same as he departed second ball. Next up was the first of two successful Wick debutants. Doddy's 31 was watched with delight by all his new teams mates. His impressively straight bat was like a proclamation of determination and desire to do well which was very well received.

Fudgey was next to go as he looked to build an insurmountable total which brought to the wicket another of the club's exciting new recruits. Kamram has impressed in the nets and really took to the task of building a big score. The most pleasing aspect of the final 8 overs from the two debutants was the awareness of the situation and team ethic. We know how technically good Kamram is, but his primary concern was to score quickly for the common cause. Likewise as Doddy found himself on strike for the final delivery he harboured no thoughts of a red-inker, but perished as he looked to push the score beyond the psychological marker of 250.

It remained on 247 though, and Fudgey was the more relaxed of the two captains watching the Grand National. It was to be Lownsy's day though as he backed the winner and took to field like a prancing pony.

Simon Bishop and Shaun Whinney opened up for The Wick, and whilst Bish struggled with a niggling quad injury, Shaun was right on the money, bowling with a fierce determination. Shaun has worked as hard as anyone over the winter and was duly rewarded with three wickets in as many overs. His first was a parried effort by keeper Jones to Bishop at first slip. His second was a sharp catch by Goldy at backward point to remove their very dangerous looking opener and skipper, and by the time he clean bowled the number 4, Long Ditton were were licking their wounds at 35 for 3.

As Ditton looked to consolidate wickets were harder to come by, but so were runs for the home side as the Wick fielding was nothing short of outstanding for the start of the season. You know a side is focused when bowlers throw themselves around to safe guard their colleagues figures and turn the screw on a side in trouble.

Kamram and Kirk joined the attack respectively and whilst Kirk found rewards immediately Kamram was made to work harder. Kirks first delivery was the only ball that really mis-behaved all day and the Long Ditton number 3 could only shovel the ball as it spat off the surface to Lown at square leg. Kirks grin was large as that of a man who has just got under the habit of a nun by telling her it was a cure for diarrhoea. He has reduced his pace but his big in-dippers when pushed to a full length are no easy task.

At the other end Kamram bowled superbly without reward. His battle with the Long Ditton number six was one of the highlights of the game. The Long Ditton batsman had the best of the opening exchanges but then Kam tied him down with 4 consecutive maidens. Your correspondent lost count of the amount of times the outside edge was beaten. To finish with 0/16 illustrates how well he bowled without fortune.

Eventually it took Dom Lown to come on and clean him up with a simple chance to the keeper. From there the Long Ditton innings fizzled out to 153/8 as Hibby also got in on the act, to cap a fine day for him, and Bish returned to collect the final wicket. A fine 94 run victory to start the season capped by some fine performances and a effervescent team effort.

Man of the Match: Paul Hibberd for his hundred and wicket. A special mention to Shaun Whinney for his demolition job on the Long Ditton top order.

Men of the Day: Tom and Alex for scoring and their support.

A special mention to Joey, Leggsy, Clarky, Matty D, Ian, Charlie High and Georgie, and Hibby's family for their much appreciated support.

TFC honours: No TFC this week - great effort from all. Although a miraculous last gasp escape worth noting as AJ took a catch off the final ball saved his bacon.

Vive le Wick

1st ton of the season

Congratulations to Hibby for posting the first Wick ton of the season in the first friendly over at Long Ditton. Never one to do things by half he managed to rustle it up in front of his proud parents, nephew and adulatory Wick supporters' club. He then had a ruck with an opposition batsman over a disputed LBW call and alleged grooming of a young umpire. Always the same...

Well done to those that made the journey across to support btw. Wickman was impressed to see that sort of effort being made. Wickman can report that the Wick banter is in fine fettle for the season, with Kamran acerbic on debut and Doddy impressing the boys with his willingness to be the butt of early season gags. Playing the fiancee card later in the day also went down well with the boys on the bleachers...

Flag Bowls

The new season started yesterday at Long Ditton. As is customary, a game of flag bowls was undertaken. It was rather more dangerous than is usual yesterday as Goldy and Hibby were assembling a massive 100 run opening partnership. Both were smashing the cover off it and peppering the boundaries. The 2007 flag bowls series kicked off with victory for Clarky, Joey or Doddy needing to hit the final flag and nestle to have any hope of taking it to a play off. Doddy was seen to be using a "french" bowling style. Oh dear, oh dear.

First Wick team of the season

LONG DITTON v HWRCC… 1) M. Goulbourn 2) P. Hibberd 3) D. Fudge © 4) A. Jackson 5) K. Razza 6) N. Doddy 7) S. Bishop 8) G. Jones + 9) S. Whinney 10) D. Lowns 11) K. Laight How exciting is this? The first team of the season has been picked to play against neighbours Long Ditton. This is an exciting selection and no mistake. There are two Wick debutantes in the line up in Kamran and Doddy and a stack of batting. Those who spent the winter at nets dodging rapid missiles will be interested to see how the bowlers fair on something sticky across the Thames. Somehow Wickman doubts its going to be run fest...

Thank you Doddy

It is a sign of the times we live in when you are suspended by your arms half way down a man-hole, with your feet sloshing around in a several years worth of DBW Tea induced bowel movements, to look up and see your team mates, friends, and would-be rescuers holding back the sniggers.

Not only that, but half of them, instead of rushing to your aid have one hand in their pockets contemplating a grab for their the mobile phones so they can forever immortalise the moment their clumsy keeper fell in the sceptic tank.

I am just grateful that Doddy is new to the Wick.

Impressive Stamina?

Wickman may have given the impression, in earlier posts, that Doddy was made of stern stuff in showing his face at nets, clobbering the ball around with some vigour and chucking down a few overs as well. This was based on a grudging admiration for anyone to have survived the club poker night (where a crack squad managed to put a surprising amount of money through the till) and then be still able to wield the willow and leather/cork combo. However, distressing reports reach Wickman of tactical slumber being undertaken as a means of surviving the carnage. Helpfully Jimmy C is here to add scale.

Nets Again

Wickman is back from nets. Doddy is there, limbering up. A relatively quiet one tonight with only 25 members on show. 25. 25. 25 was the total number of people that would net between Christmas and Easter a few years ago. Some notable absentees tonight miss the fireworks as Cranesy and Clarky in particular pepper the roof and back walls with ballistics. Kamran is back and saves the best 'til last as he, too, picks off the pitched up and dents the facilities. Wickman swears he sees a weapons inspector towards the end of the session. Gateseeee looks as if he has failed to duck a bouncer. Extraordinarily Kamran's preferred bat is 25 miles away in St Albans and he worries that he might be back seeing it properly in 2 or 3 nets' time. The boys are quietly impressed. Doddy has done well to make it down. Reports reach Wickman that the combination of Six Nations and Hibby's card night might have rendered a few long term Wick favourites unable to net. But not Doddy, he is made of sterner stuff.