WIckman's View from Behind His Fingers

So erm... there it was. The comprehensive Ashes winning performance that everyone expected from this England team. Not.

Wickman mentioned that this Australian side hadn't just become Bangladesh overnight and that there was no guarantee that we would win on a result wicket. But my oh my how we capitulated. In just about total control at 0-78 after getting Australia for a manageable 268 you would have thought that our much vaunted top six could have rattled up 400 and put the boot on the Aussie neck.

But Johnson suddenly found his range and Harris delivered and once again we'd thrown away a dominant position against the old enemy like we managed to in Headingly 2009. Immediately the English media have turned on the team - almost in some form of payback for the guys letting them down after they had written so much guff about how we were going to wipe the floor and keep the Urn in time for Christmas.

The title of this piece would suggest that Wickman actually watched some of this test. Well. He didn't. The lure of a lie-in on the Saturday and Sunday mornings (with no golf to drag him from his sack) was too much to resist. When he turned on the radio for an update it was clear that torturing himself by trying to get up and wrest the remote from Spongebob watching little Wickmen was going to be too much of a battle - especially if it was going to be to see various England tyros ducking bullets from Johnson and wetly steering Harris to the slip cordon.

That it was topped up by the thought of watching Watson finally get past 60 and us bowling full tosses at the middle of Hussey's bat was too much to bear. So rather like the England team after the second day, Wickman chalked this one up to the cricket Gods and set his alarm clock for Melbourne.

The MCG Test now takes on massive significance. There is already talk that the Aussies are preparing another result wicket (although one that won't take any turn). We are back to West coast time so it will be possible (if not desirable) to watch the first sessions rather than the evening ones which really didn't go England's way in Perth. And we are now back in a series - a good old fashioned dog fight the like of which we haven't seen in Australia for years. Two tests to go and the Ashes could reside with either country. But you get the feeling that both sides are pretty fragile right now. If one gets on top in Melbourne then the series is heading in that direction.

Right now it's too close to call. England have had one hand on the trophy and you wonder if at 78-0 they actually were imagining they had two on it. England took 20 wickets for the second successive test. We just failed to tough it out with the bat. That's three times we've capitulated in this series against two decent efforts. It's time the batsmen came back to the party and this time bought some booze and a couple of racy birds too.