fantasy cricket up to end of week 14

Missing stats from one 1st team game...

JT Raffle Raises £700+

A big thank you again to Joey and Alison for their hard work in putting together the raffle for the JT Memorial Game. And a big thank you to everyone for their generosity in buying so many tickets. The raffle raised £700 which means that almost everyone there must have spent a considerable amount.

We name checked the sponsors in an earlier post on the subject, but for all your phone needs do see Marc Holland and think of o2 as the Wick's favourite network provider, think Haymarket publishing for all your magazine needs (they do a lovely subscription for all those difficult birthdays and Christmasses) and if you live near Surbiton and require footwear then are your people.

Makes you feel good...

Match Report - 2xi vs Cranleigh cc

HWRCC 2xi vs Cranleigh 2xi
HWRCC 214 all out. Wright 97*
Cranleigh 48 for 0
Abandoned

Wrong Result for Wright

Not often you get a match report for an abandoned game. We bat. We have tea. They bat a bit. It rains. We mope around in the dressing room. They want to play on because they think they can get a winning draw. We don’t want to because the ball is wetter than a spider crab’s speedos. Everyone gets a bit annoyed. We have a few beers. Er… that’s it.

This abandoned game is worth a few words if only to recognise Wrighty’s one man Wick rescue mission – which – had he not completed it – might have seen us bowled out early enough for us to have leaked an embarrassing win to the team just below us. We aren’t completely out of the woods yet this season and it was important not to concede a silly loss.

The day was always likely to end in rain. The BBC said 5pm was a good indicator of when the heavens would open. Wrighty was patiently explaining that an unbroken front was coming in from the West and that once it started, that would be it for the day. AJ too was well informed about atmospheric conditions and gave a long lecture on the difference between rain and showers. In the event losing the toss was always going to result in us batting as the only chance to create a result would have been to skittle and then to knock ‘em off.

Cranleigh though had not brought the most threatening attack with them. A young team – Wickman thinks 3 over the age of majority, the rest teens – they bowled well with the new ball but there was no real threat to life and limb, only nagging lines. These did for most of the top order though. Sort of tied down by the good ones, Nathan, Clarky, Del and Fudgey all perished going after loose ones and full tosses. Very odd batting performance all in all. AJ, his thoughts on warm fronts coming in from the East, looked imperious but fell for the lobbed up sucker ball from their offspinner. We didn’t have very many by drinks and we didn’t have much more batting to come.

Up the other end, quite serenely, Wrigthy was scoring runs. No big shots, just working it around, looking unflustered and picking the gaps. Del and Paddy kept him company – Paddy hitting the sweetest of sixes back over the offy’s head. With perhaps the main danger averted, Tommy D and Wrighty went into all out attack mode and Wrighty discovered that some of the younger Cranliegh fielders couldn’t catch swine flu at a pig farm. He benefitted from at least two drops and a couple of youngsters running away from catchable chances. When Tommy and Powelly perished in relatively quick succession Wrighty was left with Junaid as partner and three runs needed for his ton.

Sadly Clarky then triggered Junaid to leaver Wrighty stranded. Well, when Wickman says triggered, what he means is Clarky gave Junaid out LBW. He’d just had a reassuring conversation with Wrighty saying that his digit of death was going to say in his pocket. But the best of the Cranliegh youngsters bowled a fast, straight, Yorker that hit Junaid on the foot bang in front of middle. Clarky tells me the following things went through his head. “Oh shit no, that’s out! Hell’s teeth. Are there any reasons not to give it? Wasn’t no ball. Can see off stump and leg stump but not middle. Damn. Bat behind pad. Damn. Full toss. Going straight on. Will hit middle stump. More chance of going under the stumps than over them. Damn. Junaid looking as guilty as a puppy next to a pile of poo and still standing there plumb in front. Damn. Can’t bring self to cheat. Gotta give it.” And so ended the innings with Wrighty marooned.

Tea was stupendous. No, seriously. All of Dave’s best bits on display at the same time. Mustard too. And pickle – the thick black treacley kind. Niiiice. Clarky filled his boots and when his boots were filled he filled his gloves too. 8.5.

One of their openers (the one that wasn’t the size of an oompa loompa) decided to get after the bowling as the weather was not going to get any better. He threw the bat a bit and scored a number of runs through third man, mostly off the unlucky Fudge who treated us to an opening spell of some hostility and skill. The rains then came and we were off.

It’s interesting what people talk about in rain breaks. Mostly in our dressing room attempts were made to wind up Clarky for robbing Wrighty of his well deserved ton and thoughts turned to club day. On the opposition bench the youngsters discussed getting drunk and getting into the knickers of loosely moralled young ladies of their acquaintance. Which it was pretty clear none of them had done. They all jumped on top of each other and ruffled each other’s hair in a matey way. Nice.

We had another go at getting the game on but it rained again. While it did eventually stop raining, It was clear that our bowlers would be unable to stand up or grip the ball until the ground had dried out - so after a while, when it became clear that it would not become clear, everyone shook hands and there was no result.

MOM Wrighty.

Team News: Sat 1st August

HWRCC 1ST XI V's GUILDFORD C.C. (AWAY)

1) Davies 2) Rashid 3) Raza (c) 4) Mackie 5) High 6) Perera 7) Holland + 8) Tong 9) Whinny 10) Tughral 11) Appleyard

Meet - 11:00 Start - 13:30

HWRCC 2ND XI V's CRANLEIGH C.C. (HOME)

1) Singh 2) Fudge (c) 3) Jackson 4) Wright 5) Clark + 6) Soppitt 7) Hirsch 8) McMullan 9) Donnelly 10) Powell 11) Iqbal

Meet - 12:00 Start - 13:00

HWRCC 3RD XI V's EPSOM C.C. (HOME)

1) Risman 2) Jones + 3) Murray 4) Lloyd (c) 5) Tughral Jnr 6) Cameron 7) Kashyapa 8) Linter 9) Lown 10) Smith 11) TBC

Meet - 12:00 Start - 13:00

JT Memorial Game – Wick Sunday 26th July

Wick xi – 274 for 6 (35 overs) Davies 120+, Bonay 30+, High 30+, Holland 30+, Clark 30+ for 5, Delboy Some, Bharat (quack)

Crossbats xi – 150ish all out. Bharat 2 for, Delboy 3 for, Leggsy 2?

Matty D leads confident Wick performance to remember JT

On a grey day reminiscent of the 2007 season the Wick hosted a game with much to remember between the club and our Crossbat friends. A fine knock from Matty D, ably supported by a guesting O’Mahoney, Charlie High and Marc Holland, set a daunting total in 35 overs that a Crossbats mid innings recovery struggled to match.

A strong turnout both in the pavilion and on the field was a fitting memorial for our much missed umpire, cricketing colleague and Club Man extraordinaire, John Tilley. The game was conducted in a spirit of friendship that he would have approved of and if there would have been a little too much horseplay for his liking he surely would have allowed himself a wry smile over some of the banter that accompanied proceedings in the middle.

Davies and O’Mahoney were brutal early on and a tough afternoon in the field beckoned for Crossbats. When Boney was eventually caught ¾s of the way back to the long off boundary after half an hour of extremely entertaining cutting, driving and pulling he was replaced by High who put on a big 100+ partnership with Davies who looked to be seeing it like a beach ball. Time and again Davies exploited the lack of a third man with brutal late cuts and the lack of cover behind square with hooks, pulls and deflections. This was a well deserved and finely executed century that would have graced any game at the Wick.

High – some might say circumspect here – played beautifully straight down the ground and eventually opened his shoulders peppering the long on boundary rather than his customary cow. On this form he promises much for the future. Holland nudged and biffed an efficient twenty something. Clark made 32 but was dropped five times and flayed around much like a man drowning in a paddling pool. Bharat was unfortunate to play an extravagant shot to the best ball of the day to depart for a truly spectacular duck and it was left to Delboy to sweetly time a handful of boundaries at the end to set up a truly daunting total.

For the Crossbats skipper Shandy Dunbar had some considerable nip, Mupes some truly extraordinary bowling stylings and young Tommy Robinson beat even Davies on a number of occasions. The horse bolted long before a series of catches (Clark benefitting the most although he confessed that not even being given five chances played him into any form) prevented Crossbats from exerting much influence on the course of the Wick innings.

Tea was an abomination was aberrant and abhorrent and scores -2. Not a single sandwich. Nothing but some biscuits and teacakes. Wickman – perhaps with premonition – rustled up something for himself before leaving his secret lair but otherwise would have been consuming his own muscle and fat reserves by the end of the game. Even some of the moister deer turds could have set his stomach a rumbling. The post match bar-be-cue made up for this on the way in but detained Wickman this morning and made him late for work as it rushed through his system on its way to the treatment plants by the A316.

Crossbats were soon in trouble in their reply losing early wickets to the flight and guile of MC and a spited Godhania looking to avenge his first baller in the Wick innings. There was a first baller in it for Crossbats too when a stumping was executed with such stealth that the confused batsman had no idea by what means he had perished and had to be ushered from the field like a defeated boxer in a prize fight. Not even Bharat was immediately sure how he had succeeded in ridding us.

For Crossbats Sphing and Tommy R mounted a mid innings fightback, making the most of attacking field settings and some occasional bowling from Dutchy. Tommy timed it quite effectively and was unfortunate to perish stumped with both feet parallel to the crease actually walking with a “Yes, I think that’s out” as Nicholls brandished the digit from square leg. Shping was technically correct in a way that would have pleased JT and struck the ball well and timed it extremely well except in eventually perishing. Wickman thinks it was at this point that Boney took a quite stunning catch at backward point, both feet of the ground, ball plucked a la Collingwood or Jonty Rhodes. A fitting way to go.

Captain Shandy then came in and smote a number of very large boundaries – one directly into the Millennium Wood. Opinion was divided but it was reckoned that if he actually possessed a proper bat and not something held together with Leccy tape and string, he would probably be able to hit it even further. He was lucky to escape two stumping chances off the excellent Leggsy but otherwise enlivened proceedings no end.

Delboy wrapped up the innings persuading Shandy to hole out at long on, a tailender to pop a catch to MC who was not so much at gully as silly gully (think closer than Clarky behind the stumps) and by deceiving the no 11 with a quick arm ball to bowl him if not neck and crop then certainly neck. Anyone who can tell Wickman what neck and crop means will be bought a pint. (Offer limited to one pint, to the first person).

The day passed with due ceremony. Alison was extremely feisty from the scorebox as is tradition – a few years back Wickman recalls her striding purposefully onto the playing area at Ewhurst to contest JT’s addition skills. But JT was not a bank manager for nothing and sent her away corrected and possibly even charged her for the time taken to put her straight. Here she was just annoyed by the recent re-stylings made by vandals to the scorebox and the door to it remained shut long after play before the book was produced – immaculate as always.

A raffle for the hospice at which JT spent his last winter raised a staggering sum. Our thanks go to Joey and Alison for putting the time in to making that a success, to Tom Gleeson for his generous donation of one day tickets against the Aussies (fittingly won by Muriel), to Haymarket Publishing http://www.haymarket.com for the kind donation of subscriptions to a number of fine titles and Shoes At Last of Surbiton for a fabulous voucher…

It will probably also be a long time before another muse for a painter of the stature of Lucien Freud visits the Wick. Wickman is guessing only a very few people will have established the link – and perhaps – if John himself hadn’t pointed to the source of his great pride – the fact would have passed us all by, very quietly and without exciting much comment – just like another of JT’s excellent umpiring performances.

Fantasy cricket - up to week 9

Team news 11th July

HWRCC 1ST XI V'S GODALMING C.C (AWAY)

Meet - 11:00

Start - 13:30

1) Singh 2) Rashid 3) Davies 4) Hibberd 5) Raza 6) Perera 7) Madoc-Jones 8) Holland + 9) Whinny 10) Ewen (c) 11) Tughral

Umpire: TBC Scorer: TBC

HWRCC 2ND XI V'S GODALMING C.C (HOME)

Meet - 12:00 Start - 13:00

1) Cole 2) Goulborn 3) Fudge (c) 4) Jackson 5) Sayce 6) High 7) Soppitt 8) Copeland + 9) Donnelly 10) Shinde 11) Webster

Umpire: Mackie Scorer: TBC

HWRCC 3RD XI V'S CHERTSEY C.C (AWAY)

Meet 11:00 Start 13:00

1) Risman 2) Ewen 3) Lloyd (c) 4) Tughral 5) Madoc-Jones + 6) Cameron 7) McMullan 8) O'Donnell 9) Austin 10) Linter 11) Lown

Umpire: TBC Scorer: TBC

WICK WASH

The Ashes Again

Wickman loves the Ashes. He particularly loves the Ashes when they are in Australia. There's something incredibly evocative about the deep midwinter night starting at 5pm and then having to wait 'til half an hour before the new day to see a gleaming square of green radiate across the sitting room and bathe you in a bright new Australian morning.

The last couple of times out the series haven't started well. Nasser's Brizvegas nightmare and the injury to Simon Jones are just two moments of hell. Freddy F's awful captaincy experience in the last show was just too difficult to bear even for seasoned England watchers like Wickman.

You have to go back to 1987 when Stuart Broad's Dad and some of the England greats of the period like Ravey Davey Gower and Lamby and Iron Bottom took the Aussies apart all series (there was even a spectacular one day victory when, from an impossible position, Lamby won a one day international scoring something like 17 from the final over). A young man in his first job, Wickman was late for work every test morning for two months. He would stay awake until his lids couldn't stay open any longer and wake up again early shocked awake by a wicket or or commentary highlight before moving the portable into the bathroom to watch every moment as he tried to drag himself inot his clothes.

Then, if necessary, a radio would be taken on the train to London to catch the last plays.

It's not the same now. Cardiff Wickman's arse. The Ashes will start with Wickman in a client meeting. The meeting will be full of people that don't understand the butterflies, the history, the legends. He'll position himself so that he can see the news bulletins in the reception telly. They'll be single men in the pub at lunchtime nursing a pint of IPA and eating a beef and horseradish sandwich waiting to catch the first balls of the afternoon session.

Over the season, if England do well, the media support will swell and people who ask you "who's winning" on the first morning will start to come out of the woodwork tellilng you that their favourite batsman is Bishen Bedi and Chris Tavare is their model England player. Hey ho...

2xi vs Old Pauline (a) - Match Report

2xi vs Old Paulines (a)

HWRCC won the toss and bowled
Old Paulines 123 (Powell 4 for, Cole 4 for)
HWRCC win by six wickets (AJ 47*, Cole 44)

Wick triumphs in basement battle

“You don’t win anything with kids” said Alan Hansen and the miserable Scot’s maxim proved correct on Saturday as the Wick 2s dismantled an ironically youthful “Old” Paulines side. Skipper Fudge won the toss again and this week – in a show of naked aggression – chose to bowl to knock over a team that outwardly resembled the chorus from Lionel Bart’s Oliver in Fagin’s den.

The backdrop for this game was the Colet’s health and fitness centre in Thames Ditton. And not very pretty it was too. A breeze block and glass monstrosity that would have Prince Charles foaming at the mouth, it is dropped in 10 acres of scrubland out of which someone has hewn a couple of sports pitches including this excuse for a cricket strip. From one or two angles, if you squint, it can seem pretty but you have to be a) looking away from the “pavilion” and b) be looking towards the one pretty house that backs onto the pitch.

This week’s 2xi contained 10 former 1xi players and to say that we were keen to inflict defeat on someone for a change was an understatement. Everyone on the park had a point of some sort to prove after weekends to forget the week before or being off somewhere else.

Chris Powell, in partnership with Sri Shinda, absolutely TORE in and took two quick wickets to rock Old Paulines back at 9-2 before they’d had a chance to get a look at their very two paced and crummy track. These two wickets included their opener – yorked and the their gun bat out to an athletic caught and bowled that really was a cracker before a gun barrel LBW that removed the urchin that most resembled a tousle haired Oliver with the score limping into the 30s. Sri was unlucky at the other end, beating the bat and hooping it but occasionally straying onto leg stump to be picked off.

Webbo replaced Sri just before drinks and rapidly removed the middle stump of the no 4 who seemed to be trying to clip him over the pavilion / eyesore. He then bowled 11.4 subsequent overs and failed to take another wicket despite beating the bat and inducing a number of unclaimed edges.

By this time it was hotter than a phoenix’s butt hole out there and Powelly, bowling 10 or so straight overs was having to use his noggin. He thought out a nervous looking youngster to reduce OP to 55-5 but try as he might, couldn’t dislodge the cautious OP skipper and had to be replaced by Richard Cole. OP skipper Grant and the impressive (if strangely mulletted) Winterbottom then delayed proceedings by putting on a competent 30 runs before Cole tempted Grant into a rash shot to have him caught by Tommy D at mid-off.

Coley then wove a cunning web of off spin to quickly remove Winterbottom caught well by Golby at third slip and to bowl two very small chaps off various parts of their bodies as the pitch was turning at right angles. There only remained the academic matter of whether Cole would take a five for. Sadly Clarky, who had done all the hard work by sledging some poor innocent incessantly, then dropped a thin edge behind before running the same fellow out a few balls later to deny Cole the satisfaction. Old Cymbals strikes again… Old Paulines had managed 123 which surely would not be enough, even on the awful track they had provided.

Tea was execrable. Look that one up Delboy. Served on some scruffy balcony on a deserted table there were no plates and nothing, nothing that spoke of any passion amongst those that had assembled it. It would have made a gourmand weep like a baby and Mr Kipling would have phoned a solicitor to have his tarts removed from it for fear of being guilty by association.

Worse was to come. On a forlorn side table there were some very small cups and an urn… with warm water in it. Readers – we were expected to make our own cup of tea with luke warm water and tea bags. Inhumane. Indoors there were no tables to sit at either as they were showing the rugby and the place was packed with inebriated locals. If we are generous this tea was disappointing. Stoke D’Ab’s 5 out of 10 looked like a sumptuous banquet in comparison and your scribe gives this a gross four. However it was, after discussion with an unofficial rules committee / lynch mob who were thinking of taking a bar girl hostage, downgraded to a 2 for crimes against the brew. It was enough to put you off your cricket.

It may have put off Golby and Fudgey who both succumbed for not very many to unusual balls from a young left armer. Unusual in that they were pitched up, not aerial wides or banged in in his third of the pitch. This gave some hope to OP, but Coley was in imperious form and simply swatted the bowling away. So dominant was he that he had scored 44 of the side’s 70 runs before getting himself out going for his 50 admittedly to a good return catch off a poor ball. He had been joined by AJ who played himself in watchfully before then rapidly killing off any mild flutters of enthusiasm from the oppo with a damaging display of clean hitting against a young offspinner who really gave it a rip.

And that was that. Guinness was £1.50 a pint but Wickman didn’t stick around to try it as the showers were scalding and the changing room had begun to resemble a Turkish bath. OP look to be in trouble as there is now a big gap opening between them and safety and they will need more than Fagin and Bill Sykes to keep all those youngsters from the poor house of the Fullers League.

Cole MOM for all round demolition. Powelly reserve MOM. TFC shared between Monkeyboy and Clarky. Many, many thanks to Leggsy (in pro umpiring trousers) and Statto Mackie for coming along on the trip and making the day easier on those who were playing.

[Here's the OP team photo before the game, with skipper and pace bowling attack]

Ashes delight: Alastair Cook joins Wick Blog team for series

While Alastair Cook has recently been dumped from the London Metro's editorial team (replaced by Simon "Katto" Katich) for his views on this year's ashes series, the Wick is set to get his think pieces direct on the blog you're reading now. Relied upon by many in the cricket world as the "voice of common sense", Alastair will be penning his thoughts on the Ashes series as it progresses. It's a great get for the club, so keep your eyes peeled for variances on the following nuggets of information Alastair has given the world already:

- "We're taking it one game at a time"

- "I'm not an expert on Indian politics"

- "Terrorism has no place in cricket"; and

- "I'm just focusing on my batting"

First blog to appear soon.

Wickman Junior

Darren Pattinson: One year on

It's coming up to nearly a year since England plucked unknown Australian superquick (self described) from relative obscurity and placed him into the firing line against South Africa, giving him the new cherry. In so doing, he became the 640th player to receive a cap for England, his adopted country.

While many still snigger at the decision to pick him, it's important to recall the facts from this test match. They tell a different story. Against a classy South African outfit, Darren took home figures of 2 for 95 off 30 overs on a batsman-friendly wicket. Going at just over 3 an over, Darren repaid the faith shown in him by the selectors. Terrorising Prince and Amla with, what i'm describing, as a mixture of line and length balls, Darren did himself and his country proud. It's a shame he hasn't been picked since. Cricket has been the poorer for it, much in the manner of the terror attacks on the Sri Lankan cricket team.

So what have we learnt from Darren's selection? Is there a lesson to be learnt? Wickman Junior thinks there might be, but can't quite place his finger on it. Any suggestions gratefully received.

I've added some thoughts from those involved at the time.

"Darren has been given a lot of criticism, but it is not his fault. He got selected, turned up and tried his guts out for us... I felt sorry for him. He didn't know anyone and we didn't know him, so it was very difficult."

A sad reflection by Michael Vaughan on the controversial selection of Darren Pattinson for the Headingley Test Jul 22, 2008

"We didn't know much about Pattinson. We didn't have any footage on him. Whatever team the English put out we were just going to try and prepare with whatever information we could get. Which wasn't a lot."

Hashim Amla admits Darren Pattinson's call-up caught South Africa by surprise. Like everyone else Jul 19, 2008

Wickman Junior

Vanuatu: Welcome to the ICC!

Overshadowing the news of Brett Lee's busted ribs, which leaves Australia's chances of retaining the Ashes in "deep poop", is today's announcement that Vanuatu has been elevated to Associate membership of the ICC. The elevation of Vanuatu lifts it to the second tier of ICC membership and it becomes the 35th Associate Member of the game's global governing body. The ICC also has 10 Full Members and now 59 Affiliates.

Wickman Junior is already imaging the scene now: Port Vila stadium. Vanuatu vs England and Australia in a triangular series. I'm telling you that there would be a lot of people fearing a trip into this unknown. Forget Calypso cricket....this is the new island force.

Just on another note, i'd recommend ever those interested in the future of our game visiting the ICC website to look at the other nations involved with cricket. I can't wait for the day when a side is sent to Rwanda - that will be the future...

http://icc-cricket.yahoo.net/