Match Report: HWRCC 2xi vs Stoke D'Abernon

"Pigs in the apple pie"

Report by Alex Jackson Esq

Well. That was quite some Saturday. It's not often you play through seven hours of howling winds, p*ssing rain, freezing cold, and end up actually enjoying it, especially after being bowled out for 124!!

But that was our lot against Stoke D'Abernon at the Wick on Saturday.

Our regular opening pair from last season (Goldy and Coley) got proceedings underway and both looked comfortable early on. The pitch was greasy on top, firm underneath and the ball definitely did a bit in the air. Stoke D'Ab opened up with a colt at one end, and a member of the Goonies cast at the other, but neither seemed to cause too many problems.

Coley middled everything straight to fielders, while Goldy hit everything between gully and backward point, and having been dropped twice to the same shot (you don't need me to tell you what it was), Golby was eventually caught in the gully playing at a ball at least 2 seconds before it arrived. Last year's player of the year followed soon after. 39-2.

Fudgey and AJ tried to consolidate. Both struggled for timing on what was becoming a very difficult pitch to score on. Having started to find his touch and middle, the skipper murdered one straight at cover before trying to call AJ through for a suicidal single. Aware of my Vedran Corluka-like running abilities, I had no choice other than to send him back. Slipping on the greasy top, Fudgey was run out by a matter of inches [Let's see a replay of that - Ed] and was on his way back to the hutch. I sought both Goldy and Breakwell's affirmation that there definitely wasn't a single there...

Gatesey came in for his for first league knock since his latest self imposed four year exile. It didn't last long. Gatesy slapped one straight to the same cover fielder who accounted for Fudgey. Joe Hirsch came and went, playing a daft flick for no reasonable reward, caught at midwicket.

We were self imploding. 77-5.

150 was suddenly looking like a good score. Del Boy came in, and slapped his first ball straight down Stoke's rather chunky midwicket fielder's throat. He dropped it. As he did to at least 5 other dollies... ok, it was like a bar of soap, but these drops were to prove costly.

Having bored all and sundry (27 off 77 balls, one our) and making a former WICK left hander look like David Gower, I fell to their offie, caught at first slip. 95-6.

Del decided that the only shot to play on this track was the sweep off middle stump, and having survived two extremely good lbw shouts, he started finding the middle. Crucial runs they were too. Del ended up with 22 not out, as Leggsy, Breakwell, Tid and Webbo fell for not many between them.

There were some soft dismissals and we struggled to put away a lot of full tosses. Fudgey summed it up when he said they got what they deserved (they bowled well - full and straight) and we probably got what they deserved, showing signs of being very rusty and a lack of any real game plan in conditions that clearly didnt suit. We thought we were 30 short of being competitive.

We were wrong.

Tid and Leggsy opened up. Both took a few overs to find their stride, but both bowled maginifcently once they found it.

Leggsy got the first breakthrough, getting one to bite off a length to catch the edge of their opener's brand new Newbery, only for it to fly straight into the safe hands of AJ in the second gully. Lightning almost struck twice four overs later when I grassed a tougher chance away to my left. My first drop in over two seasons of league cricket.

Before we knew it, they were 36-1 off 18 overs and behind the run rate!! Webbo and Joey Breakwell entered the attack and bowled superbly from the off. Once Webbo managed to control the swing he found a great line and length which neither of their bats could lay a bat on. Having struggled with his turtle doves in the first ten overs, Gatesy took two absolute blinders in as many overs to get us right back in the game. 42-3.

Drinks soon followed, and the required run rate was creeping up near 3 an over. First 25 to the Wick.

Breakwell bowled beautifully in his first outing for the wick (despite wearing the same Teddington shirt he proudly wore for Brook all of last season...), swinging and nipping off the seam. His first two overs were maidens, and his third was a wicket maiden. Well played.

At 77-5 we needed wickets. Stoke D'Ab had a couple of hefty middle order bats, who all tried to hurry up proceedings. Easier said than done on that track. Tid returned to take the wicket of one bat who threatened to take the game away from us, bowling a nagging length which was slapped straight to the grateful hands of Webbo (though I have to say, I did have Farncombe and the two hundred runs his two drops cost us last year on my mind...;)).

Coley came on and bowled unchanged to the end. Their Chunky fielder came in and said he would hurry things up (I politely told him that if he hadn't shelled 5 chances we would all be up in the bar by now... he didn't see the funny side of that). Having middled one four, and swung at everything else, he eventually fell heaving at Coley, allowing Gatesey to take the sharpest of stumpings. 96-7.

A lot of what followed remains a bit of a blur. I remember Leggsy taking a horribly high catch, changing his hands from fingers down to fingers up mid air (on the advice of Fudgey!). I remember Coley making an absolute mess of a high one, jumping over it, and allowing the batsmen to come back for three. I remember it being pitch black.

Goldy shelled their opener who was still blocking out of it at one end, one of the easiest catches you'll see spilled this season. Fact. Game over?

At 117-7 with three overs to go, we were still in it, though I don't think any of us really felt they would screw this up. They did. Their opener finally fell, hooking Breakwell straight to Joe Hirsch, who took a fabulous catch on the run. Next ball Breakwell cleaned up their colt opening bowler with an absolute peach. 117-9 with three overs remaining. Come on the Wick!

They took a single early on in Coley's pre-penultimate over. This exposed their member of the Goonies cast, who somehow blocked out the final four balls of the over.

Two overs to go, seven needed. They were just behind the required rate.

Breakwell to bowl. Their bat was circumspect for the first three balls. Probably cos he couldn't get near JB. He then started to panic. Could the Goonie really get the last 7 off Leggsy in near darkness?

Last ball of the over their bat had a huge heave, but middled it straight at Joe Hirsch. What a catch my son! Two priceless catches more than atoned for his earlier dismissal. The boys exploded. What a win! 6 runs too many... told you Del's runs were crucial.

But it was the bowlers wot won it. Their figures alone will suffice. Leggsy 9-25-1, Tid 10-18-1, Webbo 10-21-2, Coley 10-22-2 and an amazing debut from Breakwell 10-24-4.

One game down, one win down. Great start to the season, fingers crossed for better batting and better weather.

Man of the match - Breakwell.

[Here's Stoke's report. No mention of Goonies - Ed]