Match Report - 2xi vs Croydon Municipal Officers

HWRCC 2xi vs Croydon Municipal Officers
Croydon Municipal Officers won the toss
CMO 89 all out
HWRCC 90-5

Going into the final weekend of the Fullers Division One Second xi season there are now three teams who could finish in the promotion spots and three teams that could end the season as champions. One of them is us. We are in the mix. Win and we will be promoted. We might, if Stoke D’Ab fail to beat Lingfield, even finish the season as champs.

The only way to play our game against Croydon Municipal Officers was to assume that Chobham would beat Stoke D’Ab and that if we didn’t beat CMO it would be season over for us. The Chobbies will play Whitely Village next week which we all suspect will be a guaranteed 20 points for them. Effectively if we weren’t ahead in the points table on Sunday morning you could put your mortgage on the fact that only freak weather conditions would keep us in the chase.

So this was a must win fixture. Before the game, mathematicians in the team had worked out that even a winning draw would dump us in the mire. A winning toss was desirable too because the xi was not exactly packed with the Wick’s David Gower, Geoffrey Boycott or Graham Gooch. In fact we were only carrying three recognised top six bats. The toss was lost, but incredibly CMO chose to bat. Little did they know that bowling availability throughout the club was amazing this weekend and they would face an attack that would destroy them inside 35 overs.

CMO turned up with what looked like the best batting line up we have faced this season. Some real strength in depth was evident here. Apart from a ropey looking leftie who looked to have learned his cricket on the Champs Elysee and a number 11 who had fewer clues than Watson in a Sherlock Holmes mystery (“Its lemon entry, Dear Watson” is the punchline to a poor Sherlock Holmes related joke Wickman remembers) this was a quality line up.

O’Donnell opened up and after a rocky start found some line and length. At the other end Tid was simply magnificent. Bowling to the Twilight zone of the Millennium Wood end he bowled straight and with pace. A left handed opener was left bemused and bedraggled as he passed the outside edge time and time again. Tid was unlucky not to be granted an LBW early on but then no one on our side was to be granted one by CMO’s imported umpire. He did both ends during their innings and didn’t give a thing. Wickman thought he umpired the LBWs poorly all day, culminating in finally giving one off the penultimate ball of the game which looked the least likely of them all. He always found a reason not to give his compatriots out – ball missing leg was his favourite – and the comedy increased during the afternoon as he found new excuses. One ball was apparently going wide of off stump. That would have hit the middle stump and nothing else. It was that kind of performance.

Tid quickly lined up opposition gun bat Harfield by bowling close to the stumps and having him play straight before changing his position on the bowling crease and knocking back his middle stump. Simply breathtaking bowling. Fudge changed O’Donnell out of the attack early, responding to a need to get the batsman to play. Webbo’s first ball for a month or so was an absolute peach which bowled the other opener through a big gate to reduce CMO to 12-2.

The fielding and all round performance at this stage had to be seen to be believed. Definitely the performance of the season every Wick man was throwing himself around the green stuff and the noise levels were deafening. No bowler was left un-praised and no piece of fielding was not remarked upon. We were assisted by a square that was in the best nick of the year so far. The deck seemed quite glassy and definitely had pace and carry if not bounce. No one got the ball much above stump height all day.

Tid carried on his amazing spell by stitching up the left handed number four who looked uncomfortable to say the least. Time and again Tid lined him up and he had no answer but to play French style to keep devastatingly accurate bowling out. Down the other end Webbo profited as, frustrated by Tid, he flashed at a wide one to give the easiest of catches to Clark’s left.

The number three looked like one of the better CMO bats. He profited from a tough dropped catch (one handed, running backwards at mid on) and a number of balls that squirted up in the air into empty spaces. When he hit the ball it stayed hit. Some lovely timing saw him larrup Junaid through mid on in perhaps the best shot of CMO’s day. Welcoming the number five to the wicket he told him to play “just like Sunday” which boosted Wick confidence as it suggested that the rest of the line up might lack confidence. Whilst the lad looked useful, his first attacking stroke went only as far as Fudge at cover in the air. Fudgey doesn’t drop them.

One of the more adjacent of the LBW shouts was turned down in this passage of play and fired Webbo and the rest of the side up to even higher standards. CMO’s father figure then arrived at the crease and complimented the Wick boys on being “up for it”. There was no question we were up for it at this stage. It was like bedlam in the middle, everyone on top of their game and with more chat than Richard and Judy. With CMO managing less than two an over they got to drinks four down for less than 50 runs. Game most definitely on. Wickman thinks its fair to say that they were shellshocked.

After the break for ten minutes the performance perhaps looked slightly flat as some leg stump full tosses were turned round the corner and what passed for a mini recovery began. But mini it was. Powell, bowling towards Kingston, was fast, skiddy and accurate and convinced Coydon’s big Daddy to flash at one outside off stump. It was travelling at some pace and looked to be heading between Clark and Tid to the boundary before Clark amazed himself and others by snaring it one handed when it was almost past him. Clark’s reaction seemed to suggest he was quite happy with the plucking of the strawberry.

Coley replaced Junaid who had another great afternoon with the red thing. He is increasingly impressing his elders as, with a season’s bowling behind him, he gains greater control of his inswing. Like a youthful version of MS he gets the ball to move late and now that 11 out of 12 balls are destined to be in the corridor or hitting the stumps he is a difficult prospect to get away. Batsmen now have to play him through mid on for runs instead of being able to look to fine and long legs for scoring strokes. The effect he had yesterday was to continue to tie down the opposition who must have been wondering when we would bring on Duncan Ross or Trevor Trundle so that they could get some runs.

Coley bowled his best spell of the season and removed the dangerous number three who top scored with 36. This week Coley’s stock ball was a flighted off-spinner and his spell was all the better for it. A passing gnat with a tight chuff looked like a complete slag who’d enjoyed a great deal of crafty butchering in comparison. He was unlucky not to get an early breakthrough when a sliced drive just eluded the grasp of point but he took the important wicket inducing a big leading edge again held by Fudgey, who, as mentioned before, doesn’t drop them.

Powelly then yorked the life out of the number six, a relieved Webbo saw Clark gather a looseish throw to run out the number eight by the distance commonly known as a country mile and Delboy drew a phenomenal one handed catch out of Powell at short midwicket. The word plucked could be used again along with the word strawberries. The denouement was predictable as an agricultural heave from the number 11 failed to connect and Clark collected and sharply removed the bails. The umpire at square leg pointed a finger to the skies and HWRCC 2xi had totally dismantled CMO for only 89 of your English runs. A simply brilliant performance. A testament to the team’s work was an extras score in single figures and a feeling of total elation was in evidence as the dressing room door shut behind us.

Perhaps it was the bank holiday, or perhaps it was the summery weather, but something brought the best out of DBW too. His tea was varied, fresh and included strawberries and cream. Strawberries! He gets a nine and best tea of the season. To knock him from his perch the ladies or gents of Shepperton are going to have to serve up cake and fine wines next week at a minimum at their chalet style HQ next week and no mistake.

89 runs to chase was never going to be enough on this deck – which if it didn’t have runs written all over it (what groundsman in his right mind would write runs on a deck – it would defy belief) was certainly a batsman’s paradise in comparison to some other rainforest floors we have played on this year. Even with a more flimsy batting line up than usual and with the skipper still discomforted by his wrist injury we had enough talent to get home, if not to romp home.

Cole and Clark opened up and did a good job of getting us a third of the way there. If neither were particularly fluent, Cole’s off drive looked in fantastic shape and Clark was confident of scoring straight or through the leg side. Coley became bowled looking to get on with it. Fudge and Clark then took the total beyond fifty before Clark top edged a pie to mid on. Fudgey then slapped another pie to midwicket. T Dizzle also holed out to mid on. But Delboy and Charlie took the Wick close, Charlie absolutely tanking it all over the ground, before O’D and Del saw the Wick level before their umpire gave his atrocious decision. The result was never in doubt from tea onwards and the boys retired to watch the thirds romp home on Kingsfield as CMO did not bring any drinkers with them.

This was an absolutely emphatic victory. A committed fielding performance destroyed a strong batting line up. Hardly a single ball (except all the LBWs natch) needed to be taken down leg side. The ground fielding was precise. We gave away perhaps 2 runs in the field. Extras were almost non-existent. Proper standards.

As was mentioned in the intro this keeps us in the mix. Win on Saturday and promotion beckons. Perhaps the Dabbies will screw up again (come on lads, this was the weekend you were supposed to win promotion and help us to second place – what went wrong? – send us your champagne if you stuff it up next week too) and hand us the championship on a plate like we did for Merrow in the final game last year. It all comes down to this final weekend to see if we can get out of the league at the first attempt.

It would be good. There’s no question that the negative, boring cricket of May and June at Kingstonian and Ripley is not the way to spend a Saturday. We all want to play positive, attacking cricket. If we get beaten occasionally (see the great game against the Woodies and the dicking by the one man of Battersea Onemanside) then so be it. It’s easier to accept a good beating than a pointless 120 run draw where the other side blames you for caning their rubbish bowling all over the park for 45 overs so decides to stodge out a bore draw for 25 overs.

Hopefully the Surrey Championship division five is the sunlit uplands where sides win the toss, smash it around and then throw the ball up to encourage a close finish. Do you think? We’d like to find out…

MOM this week was the team. Yes it’s a team game played by individuals but everyone was a man of the match. Everyone gave their best this week. Even Tommy, who almost got TFC. Hee hee.

Here's a picture of a municipal officer. He didn't play but hey.