Kiwi crunch match

Wickman notices that he has been copied in on Crossbats business in his googlemail account. Here the current one day series is debated and our English Crossbat colleagues declare that its not over until Kiri Te Kanawa sings. Now Wickman is a bit of a body fascist (unlike Wickman Jr) but even he thinks Dame K has aged well and far from piling on the lbs she seems to be almost a GILF. Work it out.

What's interesting about this one day series is the slightly hysterical reporting that has see-sawed around since we touched down on the bottom of the world (it's even got a crack between its two halves) that is New Zealand.

After a couple of easy wins in the bash and giggle stuff (its less fashionable to call it this now that there is so much money being poured into the global game) you could be forgiven for reading your daily newspaper and mistaking the copy for the words "easy, easy, easy". No Shane Bond, the articles opined, no Kiwi victory.

Well lets look at that for a moment shall we? Our one day side is hardly packed with world beating talent, never mind Kiwi crushing stuff. Kevin Pietersen hasn't done much with the willow in the one day game for quite some time. The legendary innings in South Africa in front of his baying ex-countrymen are a thing of fond memory.

We're now picking Alastair Cook as a one-day opener. And Ian Bell is one of our most experienced one day players. One newspaper Wickman read was reappraising Paul Collingwood yesterday because there's no one else to write about. No one can quite believe that Dimi cantspellit is playing and then they can't believe he's being left out. What's going on?

It's only because New Zealand is a team full of Whohes? that we aren't being taken to the cleaners, having our pants pulled down and being forced to stand there and wait while they are dry cleaned in front of us.

McCullum looks like one of the most exciting bats in the world. Full stop. Oram scares Wickman and he can't understand why he wasn't cast in all three Lord of the Rings movies given that they were filmed on his front doorstep. He must have been on tour. But really? Their non-entities cancel out our non-entities.

So tonight is a bit of a crunch match. We need to see whether there's a bright future for our youngsters (some of our team are quite young. Not Tendulkar young, but young.) And that's about it. Is Wickman staying up to watch it? Not likely. But he will be checking his inbox to see who's doing the gloating tomorrow...