Man Bites Dog - or why you shouldn't buy Fletcher's new book

When Wickman is at work he and his colleagues face a constant battle. This battle is to make the people who pay their wages understand what “Man Bites Dog” is all about.

If you see a headline in a newspaper that says “Dog Bites Man” you immediately think “so what?” Dogs bite men the whole time. Wickman thinks “I shan’t waste my time reading the rest of THAT article, clearly some silly arse has got himself bitten”.

“Man Bites Dog” is much more interesting. Why the heck would a man have bitten the Dog? Was it revenge? What did the Dog do? Was the Dog cooked? (Actually it probably wouldn’t raise an eyebrow in Korea).

The point is, it’s unusual. Wickman and his colleagues at work spend much time thinking about how to create this “F*ck me” factor for clients (as in “F*ck me, I had never thought of that”).

It stands to reason. If you can get people interested in your story, you are much more likely to retain their interest for your brand.

Which is why Big Dunky Fletch’s “revelations” about Freddie liking a pint or two and occasionally being pissed around the team during the Ashes series leaves Wickman cold. “Dog Bites Man”. Everyone knows Freddie’s a pisshead. He was notably absolutely Freddied in front of the nation, played Cricket in the garden of Number 10 (no doubt building stumps from Euan Blair’s empty tinnies) and later he might have even tried to slip one to the Queen had he not been married to the most beautiful professional cricketer’s wife ever.

So what does this say about Fletcher?

Firstly if that’s the best he can come up with to publicise his latest book he’s written something very dull. It shows poor judgement as a man to dish the dirt on your captain or your team in writing. As a leader, if it all goes wrong you take the blame, like a man, on the chin. You exonerate your team and claim you stuffed it up. He's basically a poor leader then.

Secondly, it shows poor cricketing judgement. Freddie was a rubbish appointment as captain on the grounds of hardly ever having done the job before, quite obviously not having the emotional maturity for the role and not being on good enough form or fitness going into the series to carry off the role. So why pick him? Hope over judgement.

Wickman will be saving his pennies.