Wednesday, 29 August 2007

Elephant traps

An elephant trap is, probably, a big hole in the ground which swallows big beasts up. Is there an elephant trap in store for the Wick 2s this week at Old Hamptonians? Wickman outlines some scary scenarios in the run up to the biggest game since the 1s went to Guildford needing four points at the end of last season and got... four points.

This weekend sees the culmination of the season in a fixture at Old Hamptonians. 20 points will be more than enough. 10 points will do. As will 9. 8 will get us up but might not make us champions (the rules are dull, dull, dull - must research this). 7 and 6 points would get us promoted. 5 MIGHT not (those rules again).

So how could we get 5 points or less?

Route one: Rain. Localised rain that forces an abandonment that doesn't take out Lingfield and Merrow. Look some odd shit has gone down this year. Wickman doesn't put it past the weather to intervene and do freaky things. We've had 4 games abandoned already and the rain affected the Southbank game too which would have been won had the heavens not openened. We could only get four points and miss out by one piont... ohWickman'sGodnooooooooooo....

Route two: Old Hamptonians dick on us. They are a good club with good players. They finished above us last year. Hell they could skittle us and take us down with only a few wickets lost. How that would hurt...

Route three: We only score something like 155 and then can't get them more than 5 down and they get the winning draw. It is hardening Wickman's arteries just thinking about it.

Route four: OH pile on the runs and bat us out of the game for about 3 down. We collapse under the pressure and don't get even to 180.

Hell's teeth! You don't need Stephen sodding Spielberg to get busy with the script to see that there are some really big elephant traps here.

It's not easy.

However I prefer to think that bat first we'll have enough to put 180+ on the board again and enough to take a minimum of five wickets in reply. Or enough bowling to restrict OH to a manageable total, taking 7 wickets and enough batting to take on their total.

But Saturday is going to be one hell of a game. Let's hope the rain Gods are not in a lively mood...

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