Charlton did not fancy his chances of making it across no man's land
Match Report - Bushy Park League
Hampton Hill 183 for 7
Hampton Wick Royal 184 for 2
“It’s such a perfect day, I’m glad I spent it with you.” Lou Reed
You need several things to come together to form the perfect cricketing day:
All day sun in a cloudless sky with perhaps the occasional slight zephyr to cool down the bowlers - Check
Good quality team who are out to enjoy themselves and up for a bit of banter – Check
Friendly Oppo who want to win but play it in the right spirit - Check
High Quality tea including mini doughnuts and perfectly quartered sandwiches with crusts sliced off - Check (ish)
Post match balcony beer from a Wick Player’s hundred jug watching the sun go down and the deer strolling across the ground - Check
A sober Chedward – I’m afraid not, but 5 out of 6 ain’t too bad
This summed up the opening Bushy Park League game of 2013 but on the night before the game, things were not looking so rosy. The usual struggle with numbers meant that we were only 10 men and about to lose another as a worried 1st team skipper attempted to withdraw the services of the great Nomaan after his vital but tiring ton against Dorking. But Nomaan is not one to let the side down and he insisted on participating to the obvious horror of Tong G. The conversation between 1st team skipper and Sunday skipper went like this:
Tong: “ Look Smith, you long streak of p***, I don’t want Nomaan to play but if he must, then you can’t bowl him”
Smith: “Absolutely sir, I’ll just give him a bat then.”
Tong: “No, no, no, you lanky muppet , you can’t bat him higher than 11.”
Smith: “ Right you are, sir, I’ll just let him graze at mid wicket”
Tong: “ No, no, no you great sack of manure, he has to be at slip the whole day and then given a rub down afterwards.”
Smith: “But sir, what if I bring on Charlie High to bowl, surely I can then put him on the boundary like the rest of the team?”
Tong: “You ancient buffoon, Smith, can you really envisage an occasion when Charlie would need to bowl in a match?”
Smith: “Fair point, your highness.”
So we took to the field the following morning with Nomaan in an advisory capacity and the youngest member of the McMullen production line, Jonny, drafted in to make up the eleven – after some serious negotiations concerning exam revision ( In short, I’m in for £500 to bung the Edexcel Latin Exam marker, 500 quid pro quo I suppose).
The sun shone with real warmth on the Wick team for the first time this year allowing Smith to happily consign his thermal long johns to the kit cupboard. The team then took the appropriate positions with Nomaan firmly ensconced at 1st slip form where he began to dispensed a constant stream of encouragement and advice to the bowlers, this ranged from the catchy: “keep going Jack” to the memorable “keep going Ian” with the odd “keep going Graham” thrown in for a bit of variation.
The two Smiths opened up and bowled a disciplined line for their allotted overs, with Smith J the meaner of the two, going for just 15 off his 8 overs. Smith G plodded in gamely and managed to get the opener to feather one behind to the young Stan Kearney making his Sunday debut behind the stumps – nicely pouched.
Taking over from the Smith father son combo, the McMullan father son combo proved equally adept. Old man McMullan called on all his thespian powers to give the clever impression that he could bowl a bit as indeed he could, despite taking the odd spot of verbal abuse from his nurturing skipper. The highlight of his spell saw Tim skip to the wicket whilst quoting Macbeth; this clearly unsettled the Hampton Hill bat who launched the ball high into the azure sky. As the ball continued its path to the heavens, square leg shuffled nervously and pretended he lost the ball in the sun, mid wicket suffered an untimely but temporary hamstring spasm which left a young and steely eyed Jack Smith alone under the ball which had by now begun its re-entry from the stratosphere.
It was a magnificent catch, for which McMullan still owes Smith J a shandy or two.
At the other end, Jonny McMullan marked his Sunday debut with a truly impressive spell of seam bowling at a brisk pace that would have made his brother proud and was unlucky not to pick up a wicket in his spell. I for one will never forget one particular delivery, the intense look on Jonny’s face as he began his 3rd over, steaming in with purpose, with vigour but with his cap still on.
The pressure on the Hampton Hill batsman was kept up with the introduction of Alex Wright making his first appearance of the year. A solid and impressive spell with a couple of wickets as just reward for a man well on his way to regaining his pre childbirth figure.
To tempt the oppo into some reckless shots, Ian Tong was summoned to show his leg spinning prowess, which he duly did with considerable skill. Two cracking deliveries in particular caught the eye: a sharp turner that pitched leg and hit the top of off stump and a similar one that took the edge and landed in the hands of Nomaan at, guess where?, yes, at 1st slip. With Ian Tong in the side you feel like you have 3 cricketers for the price of one, which is handy if his brother tries to take out half your team.
The pitch was a 220 pitch and at about 165 for 7 we had control but perhaps we needed to open up the game to ensure full advantage was made of the warming sun. But how?
So it came to pass that Charlie High bravely took the ball and produced an over that had several consequences:
Firstly, the 15 runs that emanated from the over helped Hampton Hill post a total that allowed Robbie Oliver to make his magnificent ton
Secondly, as the fielders returned shellshocked from various parts of the boundary and beyond, happy that they had survived the kind of carnage not seen since the 1st day of the Somme, they were able to look each other in the eye and instantly know that a strong bond had been formed.
PS the inaugural survivors meeting will take place on Sunday week at the Wick.
Thirdly Charlie now has a greater respect for his bowling compatriots.
Tea was taken by all but with particular vigour by Nomaan who piled his plate whilst encouraging DBW to “keep going, keep going”.
Ed Charlton and Robbie Oliver strode out to open up for the Wick and set about the bowling with alacrity and in no time had 50 on the board. The pitch was a belter, such a belter in fact that Charlton looked unphased throughout his innings and looked set for a big score, double figures even. This he achieved but on 21 his time came.
Robbie, keen to move from 49 to 50, stroked one to an extra cover who was back on his heels. Forgetting that his partner was pining for Charles and clearly not fully concentrating, Oliver called for a sharp one. Charlton responded in the manner of a brave Tommy returning to his trench across a sodden and muddy no man’s land. He was dead before he hit the ground.
No doubt chastened by the experience, Oliver went on to play in a manner that had his team mates in raptures and the oppo fielders applauding. I don’t recall a single chance and the ball was kept on the deck virtually throughout this tremendous innings. Ian Tong and later, Charlie High, contributed well with the bat and helped guide Robbie to what I believe to be his first senior ton and what I am certain to be just a taste of things to come.
With over 830 runs over the weekend the pitch is shaping up nicely and those who have played this year on Saturdays and Sundays, especially Charlie, have benefited from the extra batting. There is nothing better than time in the middle.
So the game ended; played in a great spirit by two sides happy to be out on such a day. Jugs were bought , beers were drunk and stories swapped. The sun began to slip into the horizon and the Wick displayed all its bucolic charm that sunny Sunday evening, a charm that was then enhanced by the surreal appearance of Charles Edmonds returning tired and emotional after a day at Twickers where he thinks he was meant to be working but couldn’t quite be sure.
Such a perfect day.
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