KP back with England*

The MCC today announced that the rules of cricket are to change as of yesterday. Cricket will no longer be a team sport. It will be played still by 22 players, but each will be competing for themselves. Players will wear their own kit and each will get five overs to bat. Bowlers will be decided by lottery, fielding positions by phone vote and non-strikers by fines committee from the previous week.

The move is believed to be is response to KP's sacking from England. A spokesman for the ECB tomorrow said 'We're delighted to welcome KP back to the England setup. He's been our best individual player for the past decade, long may this continue.'

In a re-vamped County Championship 250 players will all play against each other every day for 6 months starting next week at Worcester. The one day stuff will be take on a Royal Rumble feel with players entering the field every over with batsmen and bowlers rotating until everyone is out.

T20 will not change.

*this is not true.