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| The Sunday xi Practices Appealing Under the General's Exacting Gaze |
The characters contained in this
report are fictional, any similarities with real people are totally accidental.
The views contained in this report may not be those of DBW, The Groundsman or
Chairman.
A glorious Bushy Park day saw a comprehensive
victory for our Sunday warriors under the command of the returning Kit Manager.
General Graham being demoted to Vice for the day, stood in for the
toss and managed to win and sportingly insert the position onto the baking Wick
battlefield.
Kit Manager returned on bike post colts duties,
including clearing deer mines from the battlefield, to see Private Charles
Edmunds ready to lead the charge with Robbie O, (a surprising)
opening pair went into battle. Sutton opened up with a nagging
left armer, and a chap who kept bowling wides - all too much for Charles who was
clearly suffering from dizziness so far up the order and despite a couple of
nice shots went early.
Robbie O played some nice drives in his 20 odd. Next
in, Tall Tong who managed to nick one to slip. Good catch, had the slip not
caught it his meat and two veg may well have been a mess. Anyway, Ian trudged
off and had a completely undeserved ice cream! In went Rob Richie
a couple of lusty blows later he too was back in the bunker and Robbie had
previously fallen LBW.
So Kit Manager went in to partner
DMJ who had played some lovely cover drives. Now it maybe the heat,
but a few of the Sutton bowlers kept using
expletives. First up was the left armer to Kit Manager, first ball KM middles
one into his pads, Robbie quite rightly gives not out, then expletive,
expletive. KM not one to back-down expletives back to expleting bowler that he
expletive middled it. Anyway left armer was taken off and young seamer was
brought on. DMJ played early and popped one up giving the young seamer his first
adult wicket.
In comes Small Tong to join KM at about 50- 5, the Wick on the
edge of an inglorious retreat. Both hit outstanding fifties with GT going on to
make a nice 61 not out. Both had to deal with a Kiwi who was so quick back to
his mark he could have bowled a couple before the bats were ready -
he bowled off two paces bowling quite rapidly, unable to get the
breakthrough, he then started to bowl off spinners, unable to get a wicket
decided to keep. A confused Kiwi clearly. This freed up next expleting bowler
who went for a few. At same time GT started reverse lap sweeping which seemed to
get a few hackles up – Expleting bowler to Kiwi- “bet no one has done that to you before?” Kiwi back to him: “yeah mate actually Martin Guptill did in a state
game...”
Kit manager got a bottom edge onto stumps, in
came Tim M who spanked a load for a quick 20odd. Taking us to 203
– 6. Credit to GT, who played some lovely shots in his knock. To
further note their skipper rotated the 5 bowlers and had mis-calculated putting
young seamer onto to bowl last over. Thespian Tim quite rightly dished out a
commanding performance however the spanking he dished out appeared to upset the
skipper who kept saying good shot. KM umpiring thought that this was rather
sporting, however Tim, not one to tolerate a critic was quite rightly not happy
and exchanged views with skipper on way to tea time rations. Tim quite rightly
pointing out that heckling during a beating performance is not on, whilst their
skipper not happy that GT first team skipper was batting at 7. Well all I can
say is good job GT came in at 7 as Kiwi may well have gone through us and we
could have watched tennis. (expletive!)
Tea good, DBW looking well smart
in his 150th Polo.
So out went
the Sunday unit for 40 overs in c30 degrees, Smiths took new grenade. Kiwi into
open. General Smith bowling after injury bowled very nicely
however ominous signs as Kiwi started taking quick singles and straight lofting
the General for 4s with ease.
The General counter attacking
with yorkers and late away swingers got an edge and sprawling DMJ palmed to KM
but alas down...Young Cadet Smith seeing the opportunity to get ahead on the
family wickets board gets edge from other opener, no let off this time from DMJ.
Then Cadet Smith gets Kiwi with a good one and bowls him 20-2. Excellent spell
from Cadet Smith. On comes off spin of GT and seam of Tim - one
each, great spells, then Robbie and Will take over. Will gets 3
and bowls really nicely, whilst Robbie suggests in front of GT he could be good
for a few on a Saturday and gets one wicket.
Other highlights, bit of dissent
from a pensioner, claiming he middled one, this was the gentleman who had
earlier driven his car into the allotments taking a dent. And some bloke,
running onto pitch looking for DBW like a long lost telly tubby lover. Ian
bowled some lovely leggies without joy, KM and Charles had last four overs but
were spanked, they finished 130 odd for 8.
Then drinks with oppo on very
sunny battlements, war crimes forgotten - perfect
